Tonight was special for me.
Let me back up......today was insane for me. Total first world issues, but giant tent goes up for event, then planner decides she doesn't want it anymore. $10k later and months of planning all needing to be adjusted within 2 days to pull off an event. STRESS
I left work thinking I really needed a glass of wine. I realized at this time in my "awakening" process, wine is the last thing I needed. That would just mask the stress. Send it deeper inside.
I came home and figured I'd watch some TV to get my mind off the day but my sweet pup begged for a walk. Thank goodness for smart phones right? So I laced up my sneakers (such a Yankee word), put Hannah s leash on, headphones in, and ABC app playing some useless show.
About 5 minutes into our walk something struck me. This TV show is my wine right now. It is masking the stress of my day. What about being present? I turned my "tv/phone" off and began to walk in presence.
And wouldn't' you know it. I found myself walking straight down the road on the center path - just like what being present gives you - a straight path. I smelled someone cooking burgers on the grille. I heard someone playing a saxophone on his porch. I saw a sweet man buying flowers for his wife on the side of the road. I felt Hannah rub against me as if she was thanking me for the walk. All things I would have missed if i was watching some useless show.
It made me think about the type of mother I want to be. I want to be a present mother. Not just present in the everyday things, but present for my babe in his/her activities. Something as simple as stacking blocks - I want to be the energy my babe needs in the room to know he/she is loved, thought of and appreciated.
Presence is a gift we all have, we just need to access it.
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